"I want to adopt a dog, because I want to save a life. However, that life must be a registered, purebred, female, Miniature Yorkie, who weighs exactly 2.5 pounds. The life cannot be more than 8 weeks old, and I expect her to be potty trained. I request specific markings, and details about the bloodline. If you do not have the puppy I desire, then please don't suggest another dog in-need. This is the only life I'm willing to save. And you're welcome"
"I need you to take this dog. He just showed up at my house. If this were any other dog, I'd be willing and happy to help him. But this one's a Pit Bull, so I cannot help this dog. That's where you come in. He seems to be pretty friendly... from what I can see through the screen door. I'll be damned if I'm gonna open it, for fear of my freaking life. He's wagging his tail real fast, so he's probably about to attack me. He's clearly starving to death, so you're gonna need to feed him... when I dump him at your place without permission. Oh, and I'm willing to donate 5 bucks. No need to thank me. It's the least I can do."
"Rose, I'd love to foster for you to save more lives! I've been in rescue forever! Hey Rose, I don't understand why I can't give away the rescues animals? Why can't I give them away to a stranger? These applications are ludicrous! Isn't the point to find them homes? Well I just gave your kitten away! I'm not giving him back to you! You can have the rest just not this one. Please call the cops because I'm scared for my life!"
"What is your problem with me Rose? I know I like to smile and act like BFFFFFFS when your around but I can't help it I REALLY can't help it I have this problem where I can't stop gossiping about you. No I won't tell everyone what I said was false but I just don't understand why you don't like the way I leaned up against your table & blocked your table at your meet & greet with all your accessories & tip jar after the last event I spread false accusations about you! I just don't understand why you have a problem with me giving you fake smiles & giving ugly looks when I'm with my rescue friends. Your in rescue! Your supposed to be used to people gossiping & telling lies. Aren't you supposed to just deal with that kind of stuff?.... "No!" Oh, So that's how it is! Then I want my $10 kiddy pool back that I said you could keep! I really liked your volunteers. I won't even have the decency to let you write me back. I know I'm a coward & blocked you before you could write back. I just wanted to look you up & waste my time to write you this really mature message with no communicating between the two of us at all", But clearly, I'm proud of what I have to say... and I'm not the least bit embarrassed to admit that I have nothing better to do with my time."
"Rose, I read your blog every single day, and I just want you to know how very much I hate every single thing you write. And I reeeally hate you. What the hell is a freaking CHARITY doing asking for DONATIONS?? You oughta be ashamed of yourself, girl! Asking people to donate toward a charitable cause that saves lives and provides a service to this community. What the hell is wrong with you? Seriously, why you always got to beg? Beg, beg, beg! You oughta bury your head in the sand, girl... wasting your life running a damn charity for a living. Grow up already! I'd really be ashamed if I was you. Your posts would be much more appealing if you weren't asking for a buck! You suck, Rose!"
AND ON THAT NOTE
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